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What are some funny and smart quotes?

08.06.2025 16:07

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

One day, I happened to walk past where my crush was with friends. Then all of a sudden they start laughing, and someone maybe him, goes "freaking (my name) with her freaking hair!" Can anyone offer insights into this? We're in middle school.

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

Why are details for questions here on Quora so limited? I have an account here on Quora and Yahoo Answers. I like discussing different subjects.

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

Did Obito ever fully redeem himself in everyone's eyes?

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.